Chopping
by J.Lovell
Summary: Oneshot  Based on Sweeney Todd  Blaine is a eerie barber who with his piemaking lover Kurt have a literally blood curdling operation.  Klaine  Rated T for mild violence


**Author Note: Rating T given for brief violence**

**This is a random word oneshot meaning i used a random word generator and based my story on that word, I received chopping and instantly thought of Sweeney Todd**

**R&R please :)**

Chopping

"Blaine dear?" Called Mr Hummel, "I'm running out of meat, these pies don't grow themselves you know".

"Okay Honey, I'm just finishing off in here" Blaine replied as he hacked at the piece of meat in front of him, the still warm blood clinging onto his face is speckles of scarlet.

Blaine removed himself from the preparation room, with a sizeable chunk of flesh which he passed to Kurt, their hands met and instantly locked on to each other, Blaine, pulled Kurt into a passionate embrace, their lips meeting, Kurt licked the blood of his face with a hungered growl.

Kurt removed himself from Blaine's arms, pecking him on the cheek as he got to work slicing up the meat Blaine had provided him.

His hand moved with ferocious speed, with knife in hand slivers of flesh were falling onto the table top.

'We'll need more tomorrow, so get to work" Kurt turned around to remark.

"Okay honey" Blaine replied, his heart smouldering at the sight of Kurt elegantly slashing the meat.

So Blaine put on his work apron which unlike his preparation uniform was not covered in blood.

As he entered the building, something caught his attention, something that always did, every single day.

It was a white and red striped pylon pole; most people don't understand the symbolism of it, but every day it made Blaine chuckle.

The familiar bell rang as he came into his shop, announcing someone had entered, the someone being himself.

He had been setting up; cleaning and polishing his instruments, when his first customer of the day walked in.

"Hullo" said the man, he looked maybe mid-twenties?

"What will you be having, Mr…?" asked Blaine politely.

"Mr Hudson, yes I'll be having a number three, trim around the edges and the back please" said the apparently named Mr Hudson.

Blaine eerily walked over to his tool bench to pick up a particularly polished pair of scissors, Blaine stared straight at the gleam, Mr Hudson's reflection mirroring off them.

He could see the man stare at him waiting for him to walk back as he had paused, as if time had stopped in the area around him.

As though he was pondering.

Which he most certainly was, you see Blaine wasn't sure whether he should drop or cut first, cutting in generally more fun.

Soon he realised he was just standing there, so he composed himself and walked harshly back over to his customer.

"Sorry about that" he said with a leering smile on his face, "I was lost in my own thoughts".

Mr Hudson (Finn was his real name) was doubting the mental stability of this man, the look he had gave him and was still giving him now, freaked him out. He was starting to feel uncomfortable.

"Oh heavens" He shouted out, with fake shock "Is that the time"? He asked nodding at the carved wooden grandfathers clock that lay upon the corner of the floor. "I simply must be going" Finn lied.

"Oh no sir" Blaine rebutted "It will only take a few moments" firmly placing a hand on his shoulder.

Mr Hudson was feeling most certainly unnerving, this entire situation was quite embarrassing, but there was also a feeling of fear. It wasn't just the fact that this man; who was still holding that gleaming smile (but now his eyes had darkened and looked quite deranged), was holding a sharp object in his hands, but it was the tone of his voice, the way he enunciated was just plain creepy.

He tried to stand up, but Blaine was holding him down tight. "Now really sir" Finn said with a tone of annoyance which died down by a glaring look of daggers from this man.

Literally a glaring look of daggers, Finn was terrified. Placed under his throat was a pair of scissors, Blaine had now got him grabbed by his hair in one hand with the scissors digging into Finn's neck in the other.

"Now let us do the trim" Blaine said, now removing his hand from Finn's hair and instead placing it on his mouth, muffling his screams as his scissors slashed his throat.

His eyes lost the light, as he pulled away his tool, streams of blood fell from his neck onto his lap. Blaine watched with an intense desire to lick it off his now lifeless body, but Blaine only shared his passion with Kurt.

Which reminded him, as he stood there for several minutes, he realised he needed to prepare. He went underneath the chair, on which Finn's cadaver now lay.

He found a recognizable lever, which really needed cleaning; it had a brown coating of dried blood attached to it. But he still managed to pull the lever which after giving him enough time to back away, shot itself forward, into a trapdoor they lay hidden underneath by a fancy Persian rug. Mr Hudson's corpse dropped onto the stone floor below, most likely breaking his spine on impact, if not some other bone must of snapped as he heard a familiar crack, as body met stone.

Often he would just kill them off that way, but strugglers are fun, they make the game only more appetizing.

Time to get to work.

A few hours later as Kurt was selling his famous pies, known all around western London that Mr Hummel's pies were the best of their kind. Most likely the only of their kind, in south England at least, Blaine popped into his shop. "Hello sweetheart" said Blaine, Kurt turned to see Blaine, a smile instantly erupting on his face. "Hey honey" he said, Blaine making him melt, his knees wobbling.

"Oh I think I got enough today" Blaine announced proudly. "Oh really?" asked Kurt with much approval, "How many" He asked curiously. "Oh only two, but my first chap was quite large, and makes at least 50 portions alone" he announced. "Ah excellent" Kurt replied, how lucky was Kurt to find such a perfect guy like Blaine, a guy not only far more attractive than Kurt found himself, but also shared his most bizarre obsession.

"I already placed the meat in the meat tub before" told Kurt, "While you were out dropping off the deliveries".

"Oh Blaine really?" Kurt purred "Thank you ever so much".

As they were talking, a petite looking woman walked into the shop, both Kurt and Blaine dropped their conversation as they heard the door creak open.

This woman in particular was very small, although Blaine was not much larger. She had dark brown hair, which was tied up with quite a childlike clip, holding a gold star on it. "Hi there" She greeted them "Um can I have…" she murmured, casually looking at the ranges of pies, "Two meat and vegetable please" she uttered "One for me and one for my boyfriend" she quickly stated seeing Kurt's judging look. Kurt lent in to get two pies, carefully wrapping them in a brown bag; which had 'Mr Hummel's Pies' printed onto the front.

"Thank you" she said to Kurt as he passed over the pastries, she handed over money for the food, and muttered to herself "Now where is Finn?" quietly. She gave one last smile to the couple before leaving, with her boyfriend safely packed in the content of her bag.

"Now where were we" Blaine seductively whispered pulling Kurt into an embrace.


End file.
